Friday, February 4, 2011

One Year Ago...

Hello all! One year ago today I heard the words, "you have cancer." It seems really crazy to me that it has been one whole year. This day has been bittersweet for me. Now only is it World Cancer Day but It's emotional in the fact that i can't believe what happened to me only one year ago and then on the other hand this day brings great joy for what I have overcome in the last 365 days. So, I'd like to take a little time and reflect back on the past year....

One year ago today I had cancer.
One year ago today I hated brussel sprouts.
One year ago today the fight for my life began.
One year ago today I had a huge tumor by my bladder.
One year ago today we thought it was a hernia.
One year ago today I drank cow's milk.
One year ago today was the worst day of my life.
One year ago today I couldn't wear jeans.
One year ago today I had something inside me that was trying to kill me.
One year ago today I had never blogged.
One year ago today I had really long hair.
One year ago today I was in shock.
One year ago today my favorite color was blue.
One year ago today I didn't understand why.
One year ago today I drank Miller Lite for the last time for 6 months.
One year ago today my life was put on hold.
One year ago today a hug from my Mom was all I wanted.
One year ago today I was scared.
One year ago today I cried a lot.
One year ago today I was relieved because I finally knew what was wrong with me.
One year ago today my life revolved around cancer.
One year ago today I was given 5 half gallons of ice cream because 1 wasn't enough.
One year ago today I could barely walk.
One year ago today I hardly ate vegetables.
One year ago today I drank a ton of soda.
One year ago today I hated working out.
One year ago today I ate a lot of red meat.
One year ago today I was mad.

And what I know now...

Today I am cancer free.
Today I love brussel sprouts.
Today I am stronger.
Today I take one day at a time.
Today I am fearless.
Today I am an inspiration.
Today I know that things can always be worse.
Today I am a lot of people's hero.
Today I still have ice cream in my freezer.
Today I have a greater appreciation for patience.
Today I eat organically.
Today I can drink Miller LIte whenever I want.
Today I eat a lot of vegetables.
Today I can walk without pain.
Today I appreciate life on a whole different level.
Today I hardly eat red meat.
Today I am more aware of my body and listen to it.
Today I am learning yoga.
Today I eat a ton of vegetables.
Today I am healthy.
Today I'm not afraid to ask for help.
Today I love spaghetti squash.
Today I don't sweat the small stuff, life is truly too short.
Today I am learning pilates.
Today I am making a difference.
Today I have a short sassy cute pixie haircut.
Today I am drinking almond milk.
Today my favorite color is slimey green.
Today cancer is but a memory.
Today I do things I want to do because you never know when it will be turned upside down.
Today I smile more.
Today I look for the positive in everything.
Today I understand why.
Today I am truly grateful for my family and friends.
Today I pray I never have to go through what I went through one year ago ever again.
Today I go to Farmer's Markets.
Today I am victorious.
Today I cry tears of happiness.
Today I am making changes.
Today I am excited for the future.
Today I am triumphant.

And most importantly...Today I am a SURVIVOR.

Here's to many more celebrations on February 4th for years to come. Thank you again to all of you for your support over the last year. I really couldn't have won this battle without you.

I got to spend the night with my Mom, Dad and my Dad's cousin Steve. We went to dinner at my other favorite Mexican food restaurant TeePee and of course afterwards Mom had a surprise for me. Not just one surprise but a whole bag full. She has spent the last year or so hunting around for anything slime green in color. That is my cancer color if you weren't aware. I am now fully slimed out, but i love it. What a thoughtful and clever gift. The best gift in the bag was my slime green piggy bank. It's not just any piggy bank though. It's a special one. Inside the piggy bank are emails that were sent to Mom when everyone first found out about my diagnosis one year ago. So whenever I am feeling down or discouraged I'm to take an email out of the bank and read it for inspiration. Of course it brought tears to my eyes. I LOVE IT. What a great gift. I really truly am loved by so many and I couldn't be more appreciative. Attached is a picture with all my slimey green items! Happy One Year Anniversary to me! :)

Love you all--Erin


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